Jeremy sat motionlessly at his kitchen table, still clad in grey sweat pants and a wrinkled Pink Floyd long sleeved top. His hair was tossed and his glasses were just barely hanging upon his nose as he groggily sipped the black coffee from his mug. This would be a typical look for him at seven in the morning, however it was just fifteen minutes after two in the afternoon and he had little ambition to even move. The night before was rough, and Mark and Jeremy found themselves in yet another fight about their relationship.
Mark, unlike Jeremy, liked both boys and girls and at times this got extremely tiring for Jeremy, mostly because Jeremy already found himself nervous that he’d lose Mark to a boy, but he didn’t just have to worry about boys but girls as well. Furthermore, Mark hated that Jeremy was scared to come out of the closet so they always had to hide it. Mark was more than okay with admitting his bisexuality, but he never wanted to do so because he felt like that would almost force Jeremy to come out as well. So, as usual, they threatened to break it off and just be friends.
This wouldn’t be such a bad thing, but it wasn’t like there were many available bachelors out there that could take the place of the other. That’s kind of why Mark and Jeremy began to date in the first place- they trusted each other. Honestly, it’s not like Jeremy hasn’t been guilty of letting his eyes wander to other boy’s in the past, but he would never admit that to Mark, who very openly admits to looking at other people whenever he and Jeremy fight. That also get’s tiring.
The two are wonderful friends; they tell everything to each other, understand each other, have always been there for each other… but being in a relationship with each other is probably the hardest thing in the world to do, and they’ve been “working through” that problem for almost two years. Two whole years. That’s basically the entirety of time they’ve been dating, give or take a few months.
Jeremy eyed the phone carefully before taking the last sip of coffee in his mug and picking it up carefully, clicking on Mark’s name and listening to three rings before finally hearing the boy’s sleepy voice come out the speakers. Of course he just woke up.
"Mark, about last night…."
Mark exhaled the smoke from his shrinking cigarette in one hand, then lightly grazed his thumb over the smooth exterior of his cell phone in the other hand. He’d pulled up Jeremy’s contact a thousand times and stared at it until the screen eventually and inevitably turned blank, and each time he’d press the power button and re-put in his pass code, only to repeat the vicious process in an endless cycle. Mark had just awoken, and it was no secret that he was completely hung over… and that he’d probably pushed Jeremy too far over the edge the night prior.
Mark had a habit of pushing everyone away and acting like he didn’t need anyone when he was upset… and it was no secret that he treated Jeremy like complete shit at the party the previous night. He shouldn’t have even dragged Jeremy there anywhere, he wasn’t comfortable in those kinds of environments. Jeremy was extremely anti-social and didn’t really know how to communicate with people… at least not highly social people. That was Mark’s first mistake. His second mistake was flirting with that girl bartender when he was drunk off his ass.
His third mistake? Telling Jeremy he didn’t need him, and he could do better. That was the worst possible thing that Mark could have said… but there was so much subconscious spite he had; the fact that Jeremy had a girlfriend, the fact that he was ashamed to come out, the fact that he was always upset after they did anything, and always scared his parents would find out… it was tiring. Mark loved Jeremy, he was hands down the best friend a guy could ask for… but their relationship just wasn’t healthy any more.
The phone rang, and Mark didn’t have to look to know it was Jeremy. He cleared his throat and put out the cigarette bud before saying, “I know. I know what you’re going to say.” He ran a hand through his curls and listened carefully to Jeremy’s sweet pleas and careful phrases, hesitant to say anything that may offend or hurt Mark. The fact of the matter though was that Mark couldn’t stand to hear his best friend be so nice to him about this.
"Let’s be honest Jeremy, I fucked up. I understand that you’re upset, and I pushed you over the edge. I’m sorry, and we should be friends. I get it. We’ve felt this way for a while, we just needed a reason to jump out. You can do better… and you want commitment… we both know I’m no good for that. You deserve a guy who wants a family… a house… marriage… but if it makes you feel better, I’ll always be the best man." He laughed, listening to Jeremy’s warm laughter coming through the speaker.
They spoke for another hour before deciding to get pizza later, and permanently break it off. Sure it was weird, them just snapping right back to friendship, but that was Jeremy and Mark. They were just going to enjoy the ride because they both knew dating just wasn’t good for them and they were excited to see the other happy.
How’s life oh dear baby brother of mine?
Fine, I guess. How about you?
Well, you sounded like you missed me so I cam back.
Certainly not the case.
Not really… I mean, I’m just nervous with college and everything you know? I want to get out of here, I’m just not sure where yet. I have to keep my possibilities open and wrack up opportunities. Yeah, they don’t really care. My mom said she’d miss me, but I’ll be home on the 25th.
I know what you mean, but you’re going to be fine. I mean, you’re pretty much the smartest person I know… but yeah it’s good you’ll be home on Christmas and everything… we’ll have to hang out.
It’s going to be a very lonely Christmas this year.
You work too hard, and you work too much Jere. Your family is cool with this?
Well now you’re just asking for it.
How ironic. Look who decided to pop in once everything was getting quiet.
It’s really nice… yeah.